I'm Relearning the Gospel || this is how I joy

 

Hello friend!

The blog has been quiet for much too long. I've missed it. As truths and beauties churned in my heart since the beginning of the year, I've ached to sit here and record those thoughts, but I never did. Maybe it was because they felt raw, messy, like a story half-written with no satisfying ending. I struggled too, and how could I lift up Jesus when this heart itself needed refreshment?

I laugh now, because worship doesn't depend on my emotional status; I have permission to joy in Jesus right now, every day, because HIM.

I'm relearning the Gospel.

So this blog post is just that. It's a little peek into God's gentle leading since the wee months of 2023, and I hope it reminds you of what the Gospel truly is.

Annnndddddd.... I have some pretty exciting updates on upcoming books!! Subscribe to my email list to get all the juicy info any day now!

But for now, we'll start with adorable, baby goats.

Fresh into the year, birthing season happened.

Phew, that was full of adventures! Picture one baby goat who got stuck during birth and had to be rushed to the vet, other mamas who decided to have their babies after midnight (and some of us siblings obviously had to stay up and watch). For nearly a week, there was a new delivery every day.

We were blessed with a bunch of baby goats.

Oh, they're the happiest, cutest baby animals I've seen! The kids jump everywhere, kick up their heels, and look for every opportunity to dance! Take a picture of a goat kid, and it's the depiction of "happy."

And in the beginning of the year, that's what I was praying for:

help me walk in Your joy, Jesus

That's what I desire so much. I read verses I love, and I wanted to live them out.

Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say, rejoice!

Philippians 4:4

But... I couldn't.

So I prayed. I asked for that. As newborn kids danced through winter seasons that oddly felt like spring, I asked for joy.

Instead of gleeful excitement though, the Lord took my hand and opened my eyes to the ugliness of sin in my own life.

For innumerable evils have surrounded me;

My iniquities have overtaken me, so that I am not able to look up;

They are more than the hairs of my head;

Therefore my heart fails me.

Be pleased, O LORD, to deliver me...

Psalm 40:12-13 

 

I found my heart full of selfishness, self-pity, envy, and the likes, and it was like a garden of weeds when all I wanted was for flowers to bloom. He revealed sin that was there all along. It didn't feel like the joy of newborn ecstasy but more like the ugliness of labor pain and blood and helplessness.

I realized there was no way for Hosanna to be righteous on her own.

But it was joy.

It was the Gospel.

Because in the midst of that ugliness, in the weeds, in the sin, God revealed to me that in all that, HE IS RIGHTEOUS, and that's enough.

This passage came alive for me in a new way.

But now the righteousness of God apart from the law is revealed... even the righteousness of God, through faith in Jesus Christ, to all and on all who believe. For there is no difference; for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, being justified freely by His grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus, whom God set forth as a propitiation by His blood, through faith, to demonstrate His righteousness, because in His forbearance God had passed over the sins that were previously committed, to demonstrate at the present time His righteousness, that He might be just and the justifier of the one who has faith in Jesus.

Romans 3:21-26

 

I thought maybe I could be righteous, do enough good, so I could be joyful in Jesus. All along though, Jesus knew I was incapable, inept, and HE was righteous for me and suffered a horrible death to exchange my inability for His sufficiency. Today I can live in His righteousness!

Who Himself bore our sins in His own body on the tree, that we, having died to sins, might live for righteousness--by whose stripes you were healed.

1 Peter 2:24

 

 

He traded His perfection for our sins, and somehow, Jesus is at the right hand of the Father declaring that we, His children, are righteous! It's HIS righteousness and is thus secured forever, regardless of the day or moment or emotion we feel. In Jesus we can be righteous.

In fact, when Jesus returns as King to reign on the earth one day...

Now this is His name by which He will be called:

THE LORD OUR RIGHTEOUSNESS.

Jeremiah 23:6 

 

That is the Gospel, and that is how I joy.

Oh friend, our God sees all of us, the good and the ugly, and His desire is for us to rejoice in Him, to delight in Him, to praise! We have full permission to repent and believe and thus live forgiven, righteous lives because of Jesus! It's not us doing more or having a "worshipful experience" or feeling all the right emotions. This is simple truth we can bank our lives upon, because it's not our own strength but,

The joy of the LORD is our strength.

Nehemiah 8:10

I asked for joy, but God first walked me through a season of revealing sin in my life and then delightfully showed me that He has everything I need for forgiveness; I have permission to joy in Jesus!

Blessed [joyful, nourished by God’s goodness] are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness... for they will be [completely] satisfied.

Matthew 5:6

So that's what's been churning on the other end of the blog these last months! I'm relearning that the Gospel is all about Jesus, and following Him is the happiest life. When I rest in that, yes, I could skip around like baby goats. ;)

As I slip away, I encourage you that you can be totally forgiven and joyful in Jesus, freed from your sins. The old you isn't you anymore because you're a new creation in Christ, and with the Holy Spirit in you, you can be transformed into an absolutely beautiful, treasured, gem of a soul that the Lord can use to change this world. And may you use your gifts as acts of worship to our God who loves us!

And while I've been learning, life has been beautifully (crazily) full! Spring came early, so I over-eagerly threw my garden sprigs into the wild world, and yes, my cabbage and broccoli have all but died. Oops! But I'm gardening beets (my family likes them pickled!), sugar snap peas, herbs, and am forcing myself not to plant the summery green beans, marigolds, and other produce too early. (it's so hard to waittttt!)

The season was one of training for a frisbee tournament (which we lost, but our team had the most fun). AND on Saturday I'm in a three-part race: running, boating, cycling. Eep!

And while all that's happening, there's days of working at my favorite music store, of top-secret book work *cough*, walks in flowery-spring meadows, cleaning with open windows and bare feet, and niece and nephew snuggles.

Let's chat! Do you have a similar testimony to mind? Or share what's been the theme of your year thus far, what you're excited for this summer, or a favorite memory from the last months!

((and keep your eyes peeled for upcoming book updates soon!))

shalom, shalom ♥

I have proclaimed the good news of righteousness

In the great assembly;

Indeed, I do not restrain my lips,

O LORD, You Yourself know.

Psalm 40:9

~♥~