Little fingers curl around my skirt. Pull, gentle. When I look down, I see her face, my baby sister, pointing another finger towards the door. She makes her familiar "can we go outside" sound. It actually sounds like, "Ticka, ticka, ticka?"
So we do. I curl my arms around her and escape into the outside world.
Noise doesn't still. It's louder here with the geese honking. But the air is fresh, and we explore. Together, we pet kitties, zoom down slides, eat kale fresh from the gardens. And then we sit.
She's on my lap, me sitting cross-legged on the woodchips. And we just stay there. Looking across the chicken pasture, we watch birds. Pecking. Squawking. Calling to each other. They eat bugs and ruffle their feathers and chase each other across the yard. The chickens act like... well, chickens. They do what they always do.
But there's a difference. Because this time, I'm here. I'm watching. And somehow, I'm really seeing it.
Minutes pass. We stay there until I slowly bring my little sister into my arms and we rise. Walking barefoot through the garden again, we eat a little from every plant. Then go inside again.
And I remember the moment. Those small moments I somehow capture forever. Like that time I sat and wrote a poem. Or the day when a stranger waved at me. Or the other man who looked into my eyes and I felt Jesus in him.
Those tiny moments. They're somehow huge.
I just wonder, wonder why we don't embrace the world like we used to. Why we're not still loving like babies do, eager to see the world in all its beauty.
Why can I walk through a crowd and not see all those faces? Why don't I care and love them and want to learn their stories and know their names?
Why can I live a day without laughing or smiling at something beautiful and go to bed without thinking something was off?
How can I call myself a daughter of the King and not rejoice constantly in His goodness and the gifts He pours out upon me? How could I ever complain or feel nothing when I've been given everything?
I want to be a child again. I want to run back into the woods, hide from the schedules and expectations I make myself. I want to live as the woman God made me to be instead of worrying about the eyes who might judge me.
Life is about Love. It's about this huge Love that wraps around me with every sunrise because I know Jesus is there. And that same Love should be overflowing from my life as I savor Jesus and share Him with the world.
Love is bigger than the world, wider than our minds can grasp. Yet those little moments - sitting on the woodchips to watch chickens peck in the dust - there I find it. I remember.
And right now as I type, I wonder when was the last time I did that. When did I hear a song and stop to truly listen? When did I take time to care about what a person told me? When did I see the beauty in the things I see every day?
Once before we performed a final showcase for a play, the director sat down with us. Our eyes met.
"Seize the day," she said, and I did. I lived every scene, treasuring it. I watched faces and loved them. I smiled bigger, talked clearer, stood taller. It was my last moment in the play, so I lived it to the fullest.
Today is a specific day you won't ever have again. But are we going to seize it?
It's not about stuff or schedules or successes. All of that could be thrown out the window, and we'd still have a purpose. In fact, it might be easier to see then.
Jesus.
Loving, rejoicing, praising Him. Oh, how I wish this was my constant heart, to just praise Him continually!
We need to be children again. Not whining, impatient children but eyes that see the world anew. That love people despite their appearances. That want to touch, taste, hear the beauty around us. The beauty God gave us to live in.
When was the last time you really saw the world around you and thanked God for the beauty of it? What if we stopped pretending and really lived, really felt, really loved, and really looked for Jesus right now?
I want to rejoice in the Lord always.
Maybe it starts by the chicken yard.
This is the day the Lord has made; We will rejoice and be glad in it.
- Psalm 118:24
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